diff --git a/code/_onclick/item_attack.dm b/code/_onclick/item_attack.dm
index 2931e18245..0726baab9b 100644
--- a/code/_onclick/item_attack.dm
+++ b/code/_onclick/item_attack.dm
@@ -153,9 +153,9 @@
 
 	var/force_out = force + force_modifier
 	if(force_out <= 0)
-		playsound(loc, pokesound, get_clamped_volume(), 1, -1)
+		playsound(loc, safepick(pokesound), get_clamped_volume(), 1, -1)
 	else if(hitsound)
-		playsound(loc, hitsound, get_clamped_volume(), 1, -1)
+		playsound(loc, safepick(hitsound), get_clamped_volume(), 1, -1)
 
 	M.lastattacker = user.real_name
 	M.lastattackerckey = user.ckey
diff --git a/code/game/objects/hand_items.dm b/code/game/objects/hand_items.dm
index 6c050452a1..6652151006 100644
--- a/code/game/objects/hand_items.dm
+++ b/code/game/objects/hand_items.dm
@@ -62,6 +62,27 @@
 	action_verb_ing = "touching"
 	can_taste = FALSE
 
+/obj/item/hand_item/healable/kisser
+	name = "kisser"
+	desc = "A kisser, for smooching things."
+	icon = 'icons/obj/in_hands.dmi'
+	icon_state = "kisser"
+	attack_verb = list("kissed", "smooched", "snogged")
+	hitsound = list(
+		'sound/effects/kiss.ogg',
+		'modular_splurt/sound/interactions/kiss/kiss1.ogg',
+		'modular_splurt/sound/interactions/kiss/kiss2.ogg',
+		'modular_splurt/sound/interactions/kiss/kiss3.ogg',
+		'modular_splurt/sound/interactions/kiss/kiss4.ogg',
+	)
+	healthing = /obj/item/stack/medical/bruise_pack/lick/touch
+	needed_trait = TRAIT_HEAL_TOUCH
+	tend_word = "smooching"
+	action_verb = "kiss"
+	action_verb_s = "kisses"
+	action_verb_ing = "kissing"
+	can_taste = FALSE
+
 /obj/item/hand_item/healable/licker
 	name = "tongue"
 	desc = "Mlem."
@@ -136,6 +157,10 @@
 			span_notice("I hear [action_verb_ing]."),
 			LICK_SOUND_TEXT_RANGE
 		)
+	var/list/sounds2play = list()
+	sounds2play += hitsound
+	sounds2play += pokesound
+	playsound(licked, safepick(sounds2play), 85, TRUE)
 	if(can_taste && iscarbon(user))
 		lick_flavor(atom_licked = licked, licker = user)
 
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/emote.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/emote.dm
index cb0aa23d9d..f0ccfa1a08 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/emote.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/carbon/emote.dm
@@ -198,6 +198,25 @@
 	else
 		qdel(touchy)
 
+/datum/emote/living/carbon/kiss
+	key = "kiss"
+	key_third_person = "kisses"
+	restraint_check = TRUE
+
+/datum/emote/living/carbon/kiss/run_emote(mob/user)
+	. = ..()
+	var/obj/item/I = user.get_active_held_item()
+	if(istype(I, /obj/item/hand_item/healable/))
+		I.melee_attack_chain(user, user)
+	// else if(I)
+	// 	to_chat(user, span_warning("My active hand is full, and therefore you can't touch anything!"))
+	// 	return
+	var/obj/item/hand_item/healable/kisser/touchy = new(user)
+	if(user.put_in_hands(touchy))
+		to_chat(user, span_notice("I get ready to smooch something."))
+	else
+		qdel(touchy)
+
 /datum/emote/living/carbon/tend
 	key = "tend"
 	key_third_person = "tends"
diff --git a/code/modules/mob/living/emote.dm b/code/modules/mob/living/emote.dm
index 53d189412d..d65c5c2e34 100644
--- a/code/modules/mob/living/emote.dm
+++ b/code/modules/mob/living/emote.dm
@@ -345,6 +345,7 @@
 	message = "grimaces."
 	message_param = "grimaces at %t."
 
+/*
 /datum/emote/living/kiss
 	key = "kiss"
 	key_third_person = "kisses"
@@ -361,6 +362,7 @@
 	if(. && iscarbon(user))
 		var/mob/living/carbon/C = user
 		return !C.silent && (!C.mind || !C.mind.miming)
+*/
 
 /datum/emote/living/audible/laugh
 	key = "laugh"
diff --git a/icons/obj/in_hands.dmi b/icons/obj/in_hands.dmi
index f1005cc991..8dbad29449 100644
Binary files a/icons/obj/in_hands.dmi and b/icons/obj/in_hands.dmi differ