2016年，世界如同一场美丽的梦，却掩盖了无尽的噩梦。我沉浸在自己的兴趣中，仿佛找到了生命的意义。然而，当我看到我所爱 - 的东西消逝时，我才发现兴趣也是一种逃避。或许，我只是在玩物丧志。但是，当我想要放弃一切时，却又发现事情并非如此绝对。于是，我开始学会从不同的角度看待事物。这是一个教训，也是一个启示。
-2017年，九个月过去了。我仍然被噩梦困扰。自从去年年底开始，我就难以入睡，但我并没有感到厌倦，反而试图用画笔记录下 - 我的梦境。九个月来，我画了很多画，但都是同样的内容。这一次也不例外，我不知道自己在画什么，也不确定这是否真的是 - 我的梦境。但当我放空思想时，画出来的就是这样——一团毫无意义的东西。我对此感到困惑和可疑。难道这就是我的内心世界吗？
-2018年，冬天来了。两年过去了。虽然我曾经怀疑过自己的画作，但现在我不得不承认，它们确实发生了变化。这也是我写下 - 这段文字的原因。正如两年前那样，这也是一个教训：我不能轻易否定一些本就不存在的东西。有些人因为怀疑而成为了历 - 史上的伟人，但他们也付出了沉重的代价；而大多数人则宁愿顺从于既定的秩序，也不愿探索未知的领域。“神”、“死亡”、 - “无限”、“永恒”，这些是他们常用的词汇。他们似乎很幸福，但实际上却与畜生无异，这种幸福甚至令人悲哀：我宁愿选择他人高贵的不幸，也不愿接受他们平庸的快乐。
+In 2016, the world seemed like a beautiful dream, but it concealed endless nightmares. I + immersed myself in my interests, thinking I had found the meaning of life. However, when I saw the things I + loved fade away, I realized that my interests were also a form of escape. Perhaps, I was just indulging in + trivial pursuits. But when I wanted to give up everything, I discovered that things were not so absolute. + So, I started learning to see things from different perspectives. It was a lesson and an enlightenment.
+In 2017, nine months had passed. I was still haunted by nightmares. Since the end of last + year, I had difficulty falling asleep, but I didn't feel tired. Instead, I tried to record my dreams with a + paintbrush. Over the course of nine months, I painted many pictures, all depicting the same content. This + time was no exception. I didn't know what I was painting, and I wasn't sure if it truly represented my + dreams. But when I let my mind wander, this is what I painted—a meaningless mess. I felt confused and + suspicious. Was this my inner world?
+In 2018, winter arrived. Two years had passed. Although I once doubted my artwork, now I + had to admit that they had indeed changed. That's why I wrote this passage. Just like two years ago, it was + a lesson: I shouldn't easily dismiss something that doesn't even exist. Some people became great figures in + history because they questioned, but they also paid a heavy price. Most people would rather conform to the + established order than explore the unknown. "God," "death," "infinity," "eternity"—these are the words they + frequently use. They seemed happy, but in reality, they were no different from livestock. Their happiness + was even sorrowful. I would rather choose the noble unhappiness of others than accept their mediocre + happiness.
- 简律纯
+ Jyunko
2018