diff --git a/README.md b/README.md
index e0378234..0417349f 100644
--- a/README.md
+++ b/README.md
@@ -3,12 +3,12 @@
 rust-g (pronounced rusty-g) is a library which offloads certain expensive or
 difficult tasks from BYOND.
 
-This library is currently used in the [tgstation] codebase, and is required for
+This library is currently used in the Paradise codebase, and is required for
 it to run. A pre-compiled DLL version can be found in the repo root, but you
 can build your own from this repo at your preference. Builds can also be found
 on the [releases page].
 
-[releases page]: https://github.com/tgstation/rust-g/releases
+[releases page]: https://github.com/ParadiseSS13/rust-g/releases
 
 ## Dependencies
 
@@ -33,7 +33,7 @@ The [Rust] compiler:
 
     ```sh
     # Clone the `rust-g` repository to a directory of your choice
-    git clone https://github.com/tgstation/rust-g.git
+    git clone https://github.com/ParadiseSS13/rust-g.git
     # in the `rust-g` directory...
     cd rust-g
     # Linux
@@ -58,7 +58,7 @@ System libraries:
 
 The [cargo] tool handles compilation, as well as automatically downloading and
 compiling all Rust dependencies. The default configuration is suitable for
-use with the [tgstation] codebase. To compile in release mode (recommended for
+use with the Paradise codebase. To compile in release mode (recommended for
 speed):
 
 ```sh
@@ -78,7 +78,6 @@ cargo build --release --features dmi,file,log,url,http
 The default features are:
 * log: Faster log output.
 * dmi: DMI manipulations which are impossible from within BYOND.
-  Used by the asset cache subsystem to improve load times.
 * git: Functions for robustly checking the current git revision.
 * http: Asynchronous HTTP(s) client supporting most standard methods.
 * sql: Asynchronous MySQL/MariaDB client library.
@@ -133,14 +132,14 @@ it is included in the `LD_LIBRARY_PATH` environment variable, or tweak the searc
 logic in `rust_g.dm`:
 
 ```sh
-$ export LD_LIBRARY_PATH=/path/to/tgstation
+$ export LD_LIBRARY_PATH=/path/to/paradise
 ```
 
 To examine what locations BYOND is searching for the shared library, use
 `strace`:
 
 ```sh
-$ strace DreamDaemon tgstation.dmb 45000 -trusted -logself 2>&1 | grep 'rust_g'
+$ strace DreamDaemon paradise.dmb 6666 -trusted -logself 2>&1 | grep 'rust_g'
 # Early in output, the file will be listed when BYOND examines every file it can see:
 open("rust_g", O_RDONLY|O_NONBLOCK|O_LARGEFILE|O_DIRECTORY|O_CLOEXEC) = -1 ENOTDIR (Not a directory)
 # BYOND will then search some common directories...
@@ -161,10 +160,6 @@ open("rust_g", O_RDONLY|O_NONBLOCK|O_LARGEFILE|O_DIRECTORY|O_CLOEXEC) = -1 ENOTD
 If you're still having problems, ask in the [Coderbus Discord]'s
 `#tooling-questions` channel.
 
-You can also try [tgstation]'s IRC, `#coderbus` on Rizon, but it is usually
-quiet.
-
-[tgstation]: https://github.com/tgstation/tgstation
 [Rust]: https://rust-lang.org
 [cargo]: https://doc.rust-lang.org/cargo/
 [rustup]: https://rustup.rs/
diff --git a/src/log.rs b/src/log.rs
index 41e86aac..21ac41a9 100644
--- a/src/log.rs
+++ b/src/log.rs
@@ -14,34 +14,12 @@ thread_local! {
     static FILE_MAP: RefCell<HashMap<OsString, File>> = RefCell::new(HashMap::new());
 }
 
-byond_fn! { log_write(path, data, ...rest) {
-    FILE_MAP.with(|cell| -> Result<()> {
-        // open file
-        let mut map = cell.borrow_mut();
-        let path = Path::new(&path as &str);
-        let file = match map.entry(path.into()) {
-            Entry::Occupied(elem) => elem.into_mut(),
-            Entry::Vacant(elem) => elem.insert(open(path)?),
-        };
-
-        if rest.first().map(|x| &**x) == Some("false") {
-            // Write the data to the file with no accoutrements.
-            write!(file, "{}", data)?;
-        } else {
-            // write first line, timestamped
-            let mut iter = data.split('\n');
-            if let Some(line) = iter.next() {
-                write!(file, "[{}] {}\n", Utc::now().format("%F %T%.3f"), line)?;
-            }
-
-            // write remaining lines
-            for line in iter {
-                write!(file, " - {}\n", line)?;
-            }
-        }
-
-        Ok(())
-    }).err()
+byond_fn! { log_write(path, data) {
+    data.split('\n')
+        .map(|line| format(line))
+        .map(|line| write(path, line))
+        .collect::<Result<Vec<_>>>()
+        .err()
 } }
 
 byond_fn! { log_close_all() {
@@ -52,6 +30,23 @@ byond_fn! { log_close_all() {
     Some("")
 } }
 
+fn format(data: &str) -> String {
+    format!("[{}] {}\n", Utc::now().format("%FT%T"), data)
+}
+
+fn write(path: &str, data: String) -> Result<usize> {
+    FILE_MAP.with(|cell| {
+        let mut map = cell.borrow_mut();
+        let path = Path::new(path);
+        let file = match map.entry(path.into()) {
+            Entry::Occupied(elem) => elem.into_mut(),
+            Entry::Vacant(elem) => elem.insert(open(path)?),
+        };
+
+        Ok(file.write(&data.into_bytes())?)
+    })
+}
+
 fn open(path: &Path) -> Result<File> {
     if let Some(parent) = path.parent() {
         fs::create_dir_all(parent)?