answers.txt

"Jenkins"
"Kubernetes"
"Containers"
"Cloud-Native"
"Terribly written code with questionable internal logic"
"Monolithic applications"
"Ian Coldwater"
"Duffie Cooley"
"Kris Nóva"
"Joe Beda"
"Kelsey Hightower"
"Craig McLuckie"
"Brendan Burns"
"Falco"
"Wireshark"
"eBPF"
"An odd feeling when a build passes first time"
"A complete and utter lack of monitoring"
"Automated penetration testing"
"Load balancers"
"Good old physical storage"
"An impending sense of doom"
"Analysing system calls"
"SQL injection"
"Interpretive dance"
"Friday releases"
"Being on call over a holiday weekend"
"DevSecOps"
"Rushing a release because you really need the bathroom"
"Total lack of comments in code"
"A massive data breach"
"NIST compliance"
"CIS benchmarks"
"YAML formatting"
"JSON"
"Infrastructure-as-Code"
"Lunch at your desk because you have too much work to take a break"
"The front cover of The Register"
"The top article on Hacker News"
"Directly executing GitHub projects without understanding the code"
"NodeJS dependencies"
"Istio"
"PubSubHub"
"Chaos engineering"
"Slack"
"Kubernetes the hard way"
"Machine Learning"
"Artificial Intelligence"
"Robots"
"PowerPoint"
"Quietly crying in the toilet cubicle"
"Updating your CV"
"Access keys in a public Github repo"
"Credentials in plain text"
"Buffer overflows"
"Prometheus"
"Catastrophic failure"
"Dumpster fires"
"Paradigm shift"
"Solving problems with an auto-scaler"
"Accepting PRs when drunk"
"Writing code with a hangover"
"Crippling technical debt"
"Unconditional management incompetence"
"Relationship breakdowns due to merge conflicts"
"Code reviews"
"Pair programming"
"Test-driven development"
"Non-Functional Requirements"
"Listening to a colleagues code problems and desperately trying to pretend to care"
"Unsolicited advice from an online stranger"
"A developer advocate"
"Caffeine"
"Unquestionable stupidity"
"Pretending to know what you're doing"
"Cute fluffy puppies & kittens playing together"
"Pretending to care"
"Agreeing we should document more but not doing it"
"The inevitability that everything fails anyway, Werner Vogels said so"
"Having no clue what a ticket is about but being forced to size it anyway"
"Insecure endpoints"
"Natural selection"
"Missing my family, but it's OK because the boss ordered pizza instead of paying overtime"
"A new CNCF project"
"A vendor sales pitch"
"YAML manifests"
"The uncomplicated lack of authentication"
"Authentication or authorisation, but not both"
"Emergency chocolate supply"
"Meetings that could have been an email"
"Email conversations that should have been a Slack thread"
"@here in #general"
"Only dressing your top half for a video call"
"The miracle of version control"
"Passive-aggressive sticky notes"
"Passive-aggressive posts in #random"
"Stack Overflow points"
"GitHub stars"
"Establishing dominance by questioning everything in a demo"
"Asking questions framed around your achievements during someone else's talk"
"Writing code in native VI"
"Customised EMACS"
"Discussing your relationship breakdown during a daily standup"
"Daily standups"
"A general lack of technical purpose"
"Doing the bare minimum required to keep your job"
"Giving the boring security fixes to the junior member of the team"
"Disabling CORS completely becauses that's unnecessary with microservices"
"A secrets vault"
"Plain text password storage"
"A deep-rooted fear of the security team"
"Seeing real exploits being used in a movie"
"Nodding in agreement, but having no intention of implementing these truly terrible ideas"
"Serverless"
"Outsourcing the problem"
"The root password"
"Doing the quick method, not the best method"
"Seeing if someone has already done it by searching the internet"
"Useless vendor swag"
"Unlimited and unwarranted confidence"
"Deploying 'Artificial Intelligence' by outsourcing to an off-shore team"
"The illusion of choice when being asked to decide on technology"
"Explosions"
"Apathetic procrastination"
"Giving 110%"
"Browsing k8s.af instead of doing actual work"
"Ignoring a pull request because they disagreed with you in a meeting"
"Visual Studio Code Plugins"
"Technical recruitment consultants pretending to be engineers"
"README.md"
"> /dev/null"
"Storing all the log files ... all of them ... forever ... because you might need them one day"
"Creating another golden signals dashboard"
"Your personal AWS account because the official request process is too slow"
"Terraforming everything"
"Fully refactoring the code from last sprint"
"Reading your own code and wondering what suicidal maniac wrote it"
"Scaling out all the things automatically"
"kubectl delete pods --all"
"Hopes and dreams"
"Squirrels chewing through network cables"
"The blockchain"
"Kubernetes network policies"
"Existential crisis for why we even need containers"
"base64 instead of actual encryption"
"Open Policy Agent"
"Running as root because it doesn't work otherwise"
"More sidecars than actual workloads"
"LD_PRELOAD to inject random libraries in production"
"Runtime anomalies that weren't detected in dev"
"Pretending you got exploited instead of admitting it was you cryptomining"
"Privileged: true"
"Doing preemptive upgrades at runtime to fix tomorrow's vulnerabilities"
"Breaking everything at once in a nice automated way"
"Exposing the management interface to the internet so you can access it while traveling"
"Hiding passwords in environmental variables"
"sudo !!"
"2FA defined as both username AND password"
"Pure entertainment value only"
"Deploying yet another firewall"
"Failed builds"
"Container Security"
"Scanning for vulnerabilities"
"LD_PRELOAD"
"Sidecars, lots of them"
"Vulnerabilities"
"Observability"
"Logs"
"Python"
"Golang"
"Java"
"A Wordpress e-commerce site"
"PHP"
"Cobol"
"Linux cgroups"
"PagerDuty"
"DevOps"
"PCI zones"
"Bamboo"
"Jira"
"Confluence"
"GitHub"
"Whatever's trending on Twitter"
"Service mesh"
"Microsoft Teams"
"Refactoring"
"CI/CD pipelines"
"Augmented Reality"
"How to exit VI"
"Nano"
"Windows Notepad"
"'On-premise'"
"Agile"
"Fail-fast"
"ElasticSearch"
"Grafana"
"NGINX"
"Nagios"
"RabbitMQ"
"NATS"
"Scope creep"
"Synergistic management solutions"
"Change management process"
"ITIL"
"Gap analysis"
"The reaction when asking if change management had been followed"
"Noise cancelling headphones"
"Open offices"
"Working from home"
"Espresso"
"Consensus protocols"
"Pizza teams"
"A new OpenSource project"
"TLS everywhere"
"Build pipelines"
"Chaos monkey"
"Farting as you walk past a colleagues desk"
"A balanced diet"
"Being able to talk to developers"
"The security team"
"LinkedIn"
"A ping-pong table"
"A project manager"
"Micromanagement"
"Imposter syndrome"
"32bit pointers"
"Inappropriate yodeling"
"A message bus"
"Stack Overflow"
"Whiteboarding the solution"
"Don't tell security and they can't say no"
"Pod Security Policies"
"ANY:ANY"
"GDPR compliance"
"Just closing the laptop and walking outside"
"Ignoring native features and using another product instead"
"Disabling SE Linux to make it work"
"Disabling AppArmor because it makes things unstable"
"Container Runtime Interface"
"Docker Image Format"
"Configuration Management"
"A 100 lines RUN"
"systemd"
"Multi-arch"
"Helm"
"Go template"
"CI/CD"
"Immutable Infrastructure"
"GitOps"
"DNS"
"Service Dicovery"
"Whatever the hell an Istio might be"
"An AWS service with more syllables than engineers"
"Your résumé"
"Copying and pasting from Stack Overflow"
"A Short Stack Developer"
"A technical preview that only works on Kelsey Hightower's laptop"
"An endless field of service meesh"
"An elaborate prank called the CNCF"
"A conference talk full of lies"
"A vendor named with leftover Scrabble tiles"
"Describing ':wq' as a 'container escape'"
"A new definition of microservice"
"A connection request from someone you don't know on LinkedIn"
"Shooting a Nerf gun at your boss"
"Admin rights"
"ALT + F4"
"646 Chrome Tabs"
"Command + CTRL + Q"
"Teams RAM Usage"
"@everyone in Company-wide Yammer page"