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recipes.html
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<!doctype html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="utf-8">
<meta name="viewport" content="width=device-width, initial-scale=1.0">
<title>Revolting Recipes</title>
<script src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/npm/[email protected]/dist/jquery.min.js"
integrity="sha256-FgpCb/KJQlLNfOu91ta32o/NMZxltwRo8QtmkMRdAu8=" crossorigin="anonymous"></script>
<link rel="stylesheet" href="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/npm/[email protected]/build/pure-min.css"
integrity="sha256-Q0zCrUs2IfXWYx0uMKJfG93CvF6oVII21waYsAV4/8Q=" crossorigin="anonymous">
<link rel="stylesheet" href="styles.css">
<link rel="stylesheet" href="https://use.fontawesome.com/releases/v5.1.0/css/all.css"
integrity="sha384-lKuwvrZot6UHsBSfcMvOkWwlCMgc0TaWr+30HWe3a4ltaBwTZhyTEggF5tJv8tbt" crossorigin="anonymous">
<style>
body {
background-image: url("recipes.jpg");
background-color: #000000;
background-size: cover;
background-repeat: no-repeat;
}
.content
{
margin-top: 40px;
padding-top: 20px;
padding-bottom: 20px;
background-color: rgba(200, 200, 200, 0.85);
border-radius: 3px;
}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<div class="content">
<h1>Today's Recipe</h1>
<h2>Ingredients</h2>
<ul>
<li id="ingredient1"></li>
<li id="ingredient2"></li>
<li id="ingredient3"></li>
</ul>
<h2>Instructions</h2>
<ul>
<li id="mix"></li>
<li id="cook"></li>
<li id="serve"></li>
</ul>
<button id="next" class="button-success pure-button"><i class="fas fa-redo"></i> New Recipe</button>
</div>
<script>
// a list of ingredients, steps etc
function List(data) {
// from https://www.frankmitchell.org/2015/01/fisher-yates/
function shuffle(original) {
var i = 0, j = 0, temp = null;
var array = original.slice(0);
for (i = array.length - 1; i > 0; i -= 1) {
j = Math.floor(Math.random() * (i + 1));
temp = array[i];
array[i] = array[j];
array[j] = temp
}
return array;
}
// a queue of ingredients in random order
var shuffled = [];
// take the next element
this.next = function () {
if (shuffled.length <= 0) {
shuffled = shuffle(data);
}
return shuffled.shift();
}
}
var ingredient = new List([
"1/2 elephant",
"4 milligrams of flour",
"3 tons of rolled oats",
"1 pickled hedgehog",
"2 tbspn baking powder",
"3 spoons crunchy peanut butter",
"49 chocolate buttons",
"2 tbspn vanilla icecream",
"1 cup honey",
"2 tons brown sugar",
"1 cup wholemeal flour",
"3 dozen ostrich eggs",
"7 crocodile tears",
"4 whales teeth",
"1/2 cup chicken feathers",
"200ml whipped cream",
"500ml shark infested custard",
"200 grams melted butter",
"1 deep fried eyeball",
"5 apple seeds",
"300g tin baked beans",
"6 walnuts (with shells)",
"3 potato skins",
"500g squashed kumara",
"1 1/2 fresh caterpillars",
"2 mummy kisses",
"200ml curdled milk",
"1.5 litre unicycle grease",
"1/2 bucket of used tissues",
"6 orange skins",
"17 carrots",
"1 coloured pencil",
"300g fried worms",
"1 cup toenail stew",
"2 mouldy crusts",
"3 squeezed pimples",
"7 peeled frogs",
"1 chinese cabbage",
"750ml stagnant water",
"1kg antarctic iceberg",
"1 packet dolphin whiskers",
"3 stale toast crumbs",
"1 tuft of belly button fluff",
"1 spoon of toe jam",
"3 rotten tomatoes",
"2 multi vitamin tablets",
"1 catcher of lawn clippings",
"3 crisp autumn leaves",
"1 bucket beach sand",
"1/2 tube superglue",
"1 scoop laundry powder",
"1 fried witches cackle",
"1/2 bucket sheeps tails",
"1 purple lipstick",
"1/2 cup guinea pig sneeze",
"1 anteaters nose",
"1 jar grasshoppers legs",
"1/2 cup baby dribble",
"1 cup cold dandelion tea",
"1 ants nest",
"2 horse shoes",
"1 antelope antenna",
"300ml gumboot juice",
"200ml condensed dog breath",
"1 motorway possum",
"13 crushed centipedes",
"1 grumpy mood",
"1 fairy giggle",
"8 baby wipes",
"2 puffs of chimney smoke",
"1/2 cup fish guts",
"2 runny bananas",
"1 chrysalis",
"1 peck pickled peppers",
"1 tablespoon of goat dandruff",
"3/4 cup parrot vomit",
"2 mouldy tea bags",
"1/2 metre of dingo intestine",
"2 jars of hippopotamus fart"
]);
var mix = new List([
"Stir in cement mixer",
"Chew carefully and spit back into bowl",
"Mix carefully in large bucket",
"Suck for 3 hours",
"Shake in plastic bag",
"Bash with a rolling pin until crumbled",
"Whip until frothy",
"Beat until tender",
"Put in envelope and drive over it with car",
"Add in layers in large wheelbarrow",
"Press carefully into a large oven tray",
"Place in washing machine and spin for 2 cycles",
"Tumble dry for 25 minutes",
"Stir with a whale bone until green",
"Mash between two bricks until soft",
"Knead until soft and springy to the touch",
"Peg to washing line and spin 20 times",
"Pour into bathtub and trample with bare feet",
"Toss lightly with salad servers",
"Spread in layers onto pizza bases"
]);
var cook = new List([
"Allow to rot gently for 2 weeks",
"Simmer gently over a raging forest fire",
"Wrap in a blanket and put under couch for 10 days",
"Carry it across the desert by camel for 2 months",
"Cook at 250 C for 9 hours",
"Put in socks and wear for 8 hours",
"Refrigerate until set",
"Allow to settle until it stops bubbling",
"Boil with a large onion for 29 minutes",
"Microwave for 1 minute on High",
"Place in freezer for 15 minutes",
"Grill for 30 minutes or until crispy",
"Place under lounge carpet for 3 days",
"Allow to ferment in warm place",
"Spread thinly on a library book",
"Stir gently with a D8 bulldozer",
"Roll in a grubby bath towel and slice thinly",
"Tumble in dryer for 30 minutes",
"Deep fry in used car oil for 10 minutes",
"Barbecue 10 minutes each side",
"Stuff into flattened hedgehog and bake on road for 3 hours",
"Put it beside the telephone and shout at it for two days",
"Allow to ferment in the hot water cupboard",
"Pour into garage guttering and allow to set",
"Bake into a pie with four-and-twenty black birds",
"Spoon carefully into frozen underpants",
"Slow cook for 6 hours with mossy brick",
"Stuff into a sock and carry in your armpit for 2 days",
"Pour into elephant nostril and simmer gently for 15 minutes and 12 seconds exactly"
]);
var serve = new List([
"Add a dash of chocolate sauce for colour",
"Sprinkle with icing sugar",
"Serve with warm lettuce and rock salt",
"Top with grated cheese and goat toenail clippings",
"Garnish with parsley and engine oil",
"Serve on pulverised brick with a slice of lemon",
"Serve with broccoli and squashed ladybirds",
"Top with shaving foam and confetti",
"Serve with soggy tramping boots",
"Drink with a blue straw",
"Serve with pickled eggs and garlic mayonaise",
"Serve in a rusty exhaust pipe (with a long spoon)",
"Sprinkle with toasted muesli and a cup of fresh snow",
"Serve with pickled eyeballs and fresh oysters",
"Serve in a car tyre with fresh radiator water",
"Serve with a nightmare and a selection of old wives tales",
"Serve with croissants and jam",
"Serve in an old sunhat with grated petunias",
"Sprinkle with pocket fluff and crumbled ear wax",
"Serve with popcorn and blue marbles",
"Decorate with a swirl of freshmint toothpaste",
"Sprinkle with fish scales and dried salamander snot",
"Serve on eucalyptus bark with witchety grub sauce",
"Serve with rhubarb muffins and green tea",
"Serve on an old door mat with green beans and leftover spaghetti",
"Serve with thousand island dressing and roasted crab nippers"
]);
function nextRecipe() {
jQuery("#ingredient1").text(ingredient.next());
jQuery("#ingredient2").text(ingredient.next());
jQuery("#ingredient3").text(ingredient.next());
jQuery("#mix").text(mix.next());
jQuery("#cook").text(cook.next());
jQuery("#serve").text(serve.next());
}
nextRecipe();
jQuery("#next").click(nextRecipe);
</script>
</body>
</html>