The North will not be accounted for by a theory of The North.
You will try to confront The North, but when you go to find it, it will have paid your bill and left. No, it's not in the bathroom.
The North is sometimes a Greyhound experience: uncofortable, expensive, sleepless, and surrounded by wolves.
You will start to tell stories about The North, but you will end up telling stories about yourself.